School days

So I have this student. We'll call him Charles L. Ron, or Elron for short. He's a little snot. What you might call a "troubled child." Always has an attitude, mouths off to teachers, occasionally bullies and tries to be sneaky and get away with as much as possible.

And I "get" him.

I have no idea why, but I do. I was the exact opposite in school - goody-two-shoes suckup. But for some reason I seem to be able to get more out of these troubled kids. Elron and I have an understanding - I always let him know how much I care about him and his success, no matter how much of a front he puts up, and he will do what he can to be respectful in my class.

He has grown up a bit since last year, and the behaviors he's showing in class are much better than then, and even better than they were when he first joined my class. So I decided he needed to be recognized. Because this kid needs loving attention and positive praise like no other kid I've ever met. (Ok, that's a total lie, but he needs it badly.)

I think I get more out of these kids because I let them know that I love them, I keep expectations clear and specific, and I don't talk down to them. When Elron screws up, I tell him he has screwed up, I explain why, give him a consequence appropriate to the situation, give him a minute to cool down, then I let him know that I still care about him and that whenever he cools down he can start working on whatever he was working on before the screwup. In the last month, this has worked so well that he has been voted student of the week by the class, received treasure box from the principal, and now, today, he was called for Good Citizen. Which is a huge deal - it only happens once or twice a month and only to one kid per class.

I don't think everyone was happy about it - there was a huge uproar at the assembly (the kids were totally shocked, apparently), and one of my friends' students told her, "But he's mean! He picks on me on the bus!" Which is probably true - I wouldn't put it past him. He is trying so hard to fit in somewhere that he thinks being the bully is how he can do it. I don't think many people tell him what a great kid he really is.

With these kids, it's all about the baby steps. I've seen improvement in MY CLASS. Therefore, I chose him from MY CLASS for an award that celebrates student's achievements.

You should have seen the look on his face. He hugged our principal, he waved that certificate around like it was the Olympic Torch, and he grinned like his face would split. He came back and hugged me too, and I don't think I've seen him happier.

It's all about the little things. One victory here means one more victory there.

Baby steps.